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We're about to show you in gorgeous, anatomically correct GIF format what to do when it's time to love yourself up — and to see if you can do it every day for 30 days.(This is going to be the best New Year's resolution you ever make.)"There are lots of reasons to masturbate — getting to know your body, learning how to orgasm, developing better confidence, decreasing stress, supporting healthier societal attitudes about female pleasure," Marin tells me, "but the best reason is simply because it feels good!I know there’s a lot more to sex than putting the penis into the vagina and ejaculating, but the rest is not always easy to define (kissing? What about just asking people how long they take, you say? One is that people are likely to be biased upwards in their time estimates, because it’s socially desirable to say you go long into the night.The other problem is that people don’t necessarily know how long they go for.She also offers a nine-week online program, Finishing School, that guides women to their first orgasms alone and then with partners.Better yet, she's offering Refinery29 readers a 0 discount on the course with the code Refinery29, so if you're craving more when you finish the challenge, you know where to go. Use the challenge calendar as inspiration for which strokes to use when: Feel free to mix and match strokes in any given session, and set a timer so that you can immerse yourself in what you're feeling without looking at the clock.That is the advice of my 13-year-old daughter, Esmee, as I struggle to make sense of a paragraph of notes for an upcoming Earth Science test on minerals.“Minerals have crystal systems which are defined by the # of axis and the length of the axis that intersect the crystal faces.” That’s how the notes start, and they only get murkier after that.
Even once we've moved past asinine cultural notions that masturbation is for "bad girls" rather than all women who want to do it, and we're in agreement that making yourself feel good is healthy and This frustration led me to team up with rock star sex therapist Vanessa Marin to bring you a first-of-its-kind 30-Day Masturbation Challenge.When I ask Esmee what this actually means, she gives me her homework credo.