Crossdressers dating men
After reading so much about the subject — most of which coming from different cultural contexts — I was quite afraid of what would happen to me, since I don’t ‘pass’ (my height immediately attracts attention, and that is usually more than enough for people glancing at me twice and figuring out that something is ‘wrong’ with me).So at the beginning I restricted myself to LGBT-friendly places, where it’s common to ask people first what pronouns they prefer (as well as their names! Later, however, I pretty much went everywhere — from public libraries to pawn shops, from beach bars to standing in queues to pay gas bills, from travelling in public transportation to shopping at the supermarket — and, although, as said, I cannot avoid to catch attention, I was always treated with the feminine pronouns (in other words, I was never misgendered).
I imagined him reaching out to me in passion – and he did.
So in such a cultural context, where the mere existence of crossdressers is outrageous, there is little to worry about pronoun choices: there are no crossdressers (and no transgender people, and no LBG people, etc…), period.
Such people are not to be ‘addressed’ in public, but violently beaten down and thrown into the ditches to die.
I’m obviously stretching my point here, but the fact is that in several places, crossdressers will find themselves in life-threatening circumstances, and that means that the issue of using the ‘correct’ pronoun is not even worth considering. As a self-labeled transgender person (although not clear on where exactly in the spectrum I am!
), there was a time in my life when I needed to present myself in public according to the gender I prefer.I took “Mikey” to my show, where he swept me off my feet (literally) for photo ops, stripped butt naked for applause, and fetched my Red Bulls. And in exchange, I let him grab my padded rump, smell my hair, and even bite my ear too-too hard.