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Perhaps the best advice you can give someone about having a relationship with a married man is telling her not to even start. As my friend Jenna* told me, "You can't help who you fall in love with.The love of your life just might be a married man." Being part of any couple can be challenging and unpredictable, as we all know.Traditional places like church, family events, and leisure time activities don’t present the same pool of candidates as they did in earlier times.The workplace provides a preselected pool of people who share at least one important area of common ground.As time goes on, the more western society takes a sledgehammer to the traditional family model.We’re by no means surprised that behind the doors in a bog-standard two up, two down semi-detatched there’s action far removed from the traditional.Your own survival is crucial, and if you do happen to fall in love with a married man, there are several hard truths you need to know. The needs of the many (namely, his family) will always outweigh your needs.His family will always come first, and that includes his wife. The beginning of an affair is romantic and naughty at the same time.
Then the more bleak emails poured in:'More than one in ten people agreed that allowing their partner to have an affair would make their relationship stronger'.'Over a third of people said they had or had considered cheating on their partner.' The emails came from Illicit Encounters, a dating website aimed at married people who desire affairs with other married people. Tabloids have been telling us that the sanctity of marriage (whatever that sanctity is) has been in crisis for decades now. If it's just about sex -- a dalliance, an extramarital affair or a relationship entered into with the intention of moving up the career ladder -- coworkers and companies tend to frown on love relationships in the workplace.